I prayed for growth and welcomed new challenges this year, and the company’s decision to relocate me to a different hotel has been a positive change. While I’m enjoying the new environment, the workload in the busy souvenir shop, where I work alone during shifts, is quite demanding. Well, I can handle it, but managing all the boxes and bins, ready to be checked, controlled and displayed, is the aspect that challenges me the most.
I generally don’t complain, but this is an issue I felt compelled to address. So, I asked for additional support for my shift, and thankfully, efforts are being made to accommodate that. However, for today, I find myself working alone. That means It’s self-talk time. I’m not crazy, but I know I am weird.
After a lengthy day dealing with this workload, my bladder is full and ready for relief through my urethra. Do I really have to say that? Let me head to the bathroom. I secured the store with the key, taking a few steps away before realizing, “Oh, the other key—I forgot we need the key card for the bathroom.” I went back and got the key.
Walking towards the hotel lobby, you’ll notice the front desk area on your left. However, what makes me uneasy is the necessity to pass through that space to reach the bathroom—there’s no alternative way. It’s uncomfortable to have the front desk staff lined up there, observing your every move as you walk. I can’t help but feel like I’m walking down a runway. I may lack the confidence for such attention, but should I consider requesting a red carpet?
“Good evening,” I uttered as I walked past, refraining from meeting every gaze. Is it unkind of me? I’m unsure; perhaps it’s just my shyness coming through. Especially now, with no guests in the lobby, the atmosphere feels awkward, and I just wish I could vanish. Regardless, I need to express this discomfort; otherwise, there might be a flood of pee in the store.
My body is weary, and my mind is fatigued. “Once I finish work, I plan to sit down at my desk and compile a to-do list for the evening. Priorities include preparing food for tomorrow and addressing some pending orders. Wait, what should I cook? Soup? or pasta?
As I contemplated my to-do list, my thoughts shifted to how I could creatively decorate my journal planner. Deep down, I knew the to-do list was merely an excuse; I just yearned for my journal to exude creativity. It dawned on me: perhaps this is why household chores always seem to linger unfinished. I found myself engrossed in the design process, adorning the planner with stickers and meticulously arranging elements. Before I knew it, I was immersed in writing, writing, and more writing until the realization struck—it was time for bed. “What was the food plan again?” I chuckled, realizing I had been having a conversation with myself. This is me.
As I wandered in my thoughts, a sudden realization hit me: “Dang it, I forgot the key card in the bathroom.” Just as I was about to open the souvenir store, I noticed the absence of the bathroom key in my hand.
Taking a deep breath, I told myself to approach one of the agents and borrow a key to retrieve mine. It felt incredibly uncomfortable, and I couldn’t pinpoint why. Why am I so anti-social? Despite the discomfort, I reassured myself, “I can do this! Let’s go.”
“Hi, good evening. How are you? I was wondering if I could borrow an extra bathroom key because I left mine in there,” I asked the lady at the front desk. She kindly handed me one, and I expressed my apologies for the disturbance.
“Oh no, you cannot do that. We cannot help you,” answered a guy next to her, teasingly. I glanced at him, and he flashed a smile. I smiled back and left.
As I pondered the encounter, I found myself questioning, “Who is he again? What did I miss?” Since I began working at the hotel, I had never seen him before. A moment of realization struck me, and I admitted, “That’s a lie. I don’t really pay much attention to them, anyway.” I considered the possibility that he might be new to the hotel.
Hmm… but not bad! Not bad at all. The expression in his voice and the depth of his eyes are… hmm… I found myself making a heart sign with my hand, similar to what the Koreans do. Okay, Lindsey, calm down. You’re not allowed to fantasize about someone else, okay? Calm down. I chuckled to myself, acknowledging the lighthearted nature of my thoughts.
The thought crossed my mind: “But what is he doing here?” I couldn’t quite figure out why that question popped into my head.
That’s when I had a realization—I haven’t been observing my surroundings as keenly as I used to. In the past few years, my focus was consumed by sadness and depression. I withdrew from caring about others, limited my social interactions, and simply didn’t invest in the world around me. Lately, however, I’ve sensed a different message from the Lord, a call to recognize that we are created for Him and for others.
As I transition to a new workplace, my prayer is to intentionally inspire others by just being myself and doing whatever the Lord asks of me.
“But Lord, this is getting exciting; it’s like a vitamin for my eyes.” I reflected on the newfound excitement and perspective that embracing this shift was bringing into my life.
THE NEXT DAY
Another brand new day, and once again, my shift is in the afternoon. While chatting with my supervisor, a familiar voice from behind greeted us with a casual “Hi ladies.” As we both turned around, there he was—the front desk guy.
This is the first time I have seen him in the store, and unlike his colleagues, he doesn’t make frequent visits here.
That’s strange.
I found myself in disbelief as I turned in another direction, allowing my supervisor to assist him. I couldn’t understand why I was feeling so shy all of a sudden; a sense of nervousness had taken over.
What’s wrong with me?
There were a few shifts when I was alone, and he came to buy something. I tried to act normal, but he really does make me nervous. What the heck is wrong? I don’t like it.
Meet Megan
Today, I’ll be working with my colleague, Megan. We used to work together at the other store, making it easier to adjust to this new environment. I’m grateful to have a familiar face as a workmate. And we just clicked right away.
She’s both pretty and nice, with big, beautiful eyes adorned by exceptionally long eyelashes. Many people assume they’re fake, given their stunning appearance. She stands at about 5’2″ in height, and what adds to her allure is her well-shaped buttocks, the subject of admiration for many.
She’s the apple of the eye, especially for the guys around here in the hotel.
When I inquired if she was familiar with one of the front desk agents, I attempted not to provide a detailed description, but she seemed to have an idea of whom I was referring to. She added, ‘He never comes here, though.’ To that, I mentioned that he had visited a few times during my shifts.
As I continued the conversation, I couldn’t help but notice a shift in her expression. She began to tell me that when she was new here, the guys outside mentioned that the front desk guy had expressed interest in getting her number. It struck me that the bellmen seemed familiar with her, possibly due to the sports she is involved in. She also mentioned that the guy never comes during her shift, suggesting he might be shy around people he likes.
“Why didn’t you give him your number, then?” I asked. She replied with a laugh, “I have a boyfriend, girl!”
“He’s attractive, though,” I interrupted. She looked at me suspiciously. I responded with a wide smile, saying, “I know I cannot like him, but I have eyes to see. I think I am only appreciating the creation of God.” burst into laughter.
Thank you, Jesus. This is good for my eyes. HAHA
My friendship with Megan continues to strengthen with each passing day, and I’m grateful for the curiosity she has developed about God. We engage in meaningful discussions and study sessions on the subject. The excitement further grows as we welcome Elena and Gabriela into our circle, making the journey of faith even more enjoyable.
Hello, lovely readers! I’m delighted to have you here. 🙂 If you haven’t had a chance to read the first chapter, you can find it here.
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[…] Here are the first two chapters: Chapter 1 Admiring You from Afar, Chapter 2 First Encounter […]